For those of you who are thinking " why would she not go " let me explain.
I love the parade, and the thrill it brings to children. I love that families gather to watch something so fun and new each year. I enjoyed being at the lilac parade with mike last year, our first one as a family since madaya was finally here in our lifes. So as that day went on all i could think about was how in the hell i would make it through yet another function that I so much want to be a family thing. As the day went on I thought more and more about how I would feel if someday madaya asked me why we missed one... Its going to be a tradition.
I thought I cannot tell her that just because mommy missed daddy so much and couldnt do it as a family that I cut it out for the both of us. That thought alone killed me.
Im going to have to adjust to not doing things as a family anyways - as we had/have lots planned this summer, so i got dressed, got her dressed and went downtown.
I am so happy we went it was a wonderful time!
I even learned that no matter how unhappy I am --- shes totally clueless as long as she sees me smile.
We both miss him and thats for sure - but we can be ok.
Heres some pics of the fun night!
Im so glad it didnt rain on my parade!
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