086,400 times...
Is how many times I think of him. Seriously do the math. Thats how many seconds are in each day...
I could spend all these seconds thinking that I am so horrible for the things I did, but I dont. Ive spent them trying to learn to forgive my foolish selfish actions, and to repair myself for the damage I caused myself by trying to protect my self.
I spend them thinking about why and how I did them, and how I can do them better. Of course I want it better for him, but he wont have me. Why am I not good enough - 86,400 times I ask this.
86,400 - Its how many times I pray to god he sets us free, only to bring us together and learn from our actions, its how many times I look at madaya and see daddy in her. Its how many times I long for his sweet words, touch and smell. Its how many times I am sorry. Its how many times I love him, think of him.... want him... respect him.... MISS HIM! Its how many times I forget to breath, because I am so lonely.
86,400 times .....
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
Yesterday Today and Tomorrow
Welcome once again to a re-done reorganized blog... big changes in store.
Origininally a few years ago I started this blog through a hard time, evolved it into a family blog, and now will reclaim this as primarily my blog.
It is truely my Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow.
The man I love, and was married to for close to 10 years has again decided to leave us. So with this please deal with me as we transition and find our wings.
Please keep any and all comments nice - as I do not have hard feelings at this time to him - only confusion, frustration and hurt.
Keep reading - this will be great therapy!!
Origininally a few years ago I started this blog through a hard time, evolved it into a family blog, and now will reclaim this as primarily my blog.
It is truely my Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow.
The man I love, and was married to for close to 10 years has again decided to leave us. So with this please deal with me as we transition and find our wings.
Please keep any and all comments nice - as I do not have hard feelings at this time to him - only confusion, frustration and hurt.
Keep reading - this will be great therapy!!
Blog Archive
-
▼
2008
(159)
-
▼
May
(26)
- A first Date
- Time for some good news...
- Allergies or Not?
- oh funny roo Photo
- from myspace and beyond
- So he WANTS her? MY ASS!
- Just the Facts
- A true song...
- Why?
- What it means
- when will something good happen?
- Didnt rain on my parade
- Ready Reader
- Putting Evans Eyes back on line
- How the Hell does he ....
- Weeee
- A Happy ( not so much ) Mothers day ( very much )
- Baby blues.. not so blue!
- His Ideal Family Photo?!
- The first week down!
- Tell me shes not sick ... AGAIN
- A hard days work?!
- Tell me shes not sick ... AGAIN
- 86,400 times!
- 3 AM I must be lonely!
- The hardest thing
-
▼
May
(26)
Looking forward :
News: Mike left on Feb 14th, 2010. I have erased all our plans scheduled and the recent ongoings because clearly they will not happen. There will be no 2nd child for now, and there is no trips planned.
I will try hard to update on Roo and I as we transistion. February: 22nd - Daya starts swim lessons March: 17th Mommy and Daya Looking forward to the st. Patricks day parade . Working on garden, and yard.
0 comments:
Post a Comment