I want to choke him

Just had to get this out
I want to choke him!
I am deffinatly in the ANGRY stage right now! Ugh. And Although I " want to choke him " All I can do is cry. I love him.

HOW DO I STOP LOVING AND LONGING FOR HIM?

I miss my husband so freaking much but hes totally untouchable.
He said he does just want the divorce - and doesnt want to work on it.... so I have no choice. Hes making this for me. I am mad because I never wanted a family with out him, I never wanted to not be able to hug him, love him and be here for him and I never wanted him to run away from a huge problem. I have openly admitted my wrongs, and said truthfully I am sorry, and want to learn a new one. But if i cannot be good enough for him then what?
I sure pray god has someone in mind, cause right now I am so lonely, and want so badly to be able to love someone. I want to love him - but he wont let me!
Im going to keep hope in my heart that someday maybe he will want this and see that he did have more than he thoughts in me.

Going to bed..