Do you guys even know?

I heard loud and clear today that again ( despite our tries to not be in it all ) some of the family is very upset with me because ( this is just one reason I guess ( But I am confused ) ) I didn't let them see Madaya on Halloween?!

I took a deep breath before I wrote this, got all my crying out and thought about it and all I want to ask are these things:

Do you guys even know why/ or what has been going on with Madaya? Why we didn't go trick or treating or everywhere or what we even DID do for Halloween?

Did you know she has been so sick and underweight again that they are talking a possible feeding tube if we can't figure her out and keep her up on the charts by her adjusted 3 year mark, we are doing asthma treatments 4 times a day via nebulizer, and lets add in there the added meds for her stomach which apparently is still under developed and not closing causing lots of reflux and her weight loss. She was sick for 3 weeks before halloween, all through halloween, and still just now recovering although this past weekend was a set back.

Do you guys even know that I myself have been super ill. My thyroid is giving me hell - and they are screening for thyroid cancer. I have been sickly and not doing well at all. Lets add to this the anemia and my lack of any energy. No worries though the Dr's have me under control.

Do you guys know that we do miss you and love you but get frustrated that we don't seem to be good enough for any of you? that we don't ever seem to fit in with your busy plans, and lifes. It sucks.

Do you guys know we weren't really having " Tofu turkey " and that it's not very nice of you to make fun of how we eat healthy if you choose not to understand it or ask?

Do you guys even know what else is going on ... do you want to?

Do you guys even know how much we want our FAMILY together way more often, and not just for the " HOLIDAYS " ?

I wish you would have just come to me - not said anything to her about how hurt you are by us, because again it causes problems. Things for us are no different. We are just waiting to see when you guys figure out that we have been here the whole time. To find out where we do fit with you.
Of course I want to see you all for the Holidays I want to see you more than that - but sounds like we don't even get that chance. Sucks.

Do you guys even know?